Dropping ....

down

down

down

down

down to the ground …
where i will be carried away by a bird
maybe, or a chipmunk
perhaps a squirrel
or an insect or
one of those giant bipedal things
i hear the one behind the trees likes to
let us dry with others of our sisters
or press us into books
and surround us with inks …
but that is a myth.

to die

to be placed in a nest
to be eaten
to moulder …
it makes no difference for all is to die

what is it to die?

i have no memory of this
i have memory of first stirring
unfolding
pushing through dirt,
the earth, to unfold again
becoming green before
going in all directions
being all things
sucking up liquid and passing it up high
pushing it to the farthest ends of the leaves
breaking down dirt into its base materials and
heaving it, lifting and pushing it up and out
dragging waste back and down
letting it fall
but carefully
to the roots, and out into the earth again

when i was most tired, my cells changed
i remember
first a little, then a lot
i felt safe and quietened
drowsy after so much pushing and lifting
i was given to drink
i didn’t know i was so thirsty
the water was cool and metallic
i sensed movement continuing
the pattern the same as before
in which i had taken part
but a long way away
i slept

when i woke i remembered the pattern of movement
first, before anything i sensed, i remembered
i remember
i was translucent and i panicked
and then all the colours in the world collided
i felt cold and warm and alone
unfolded, unfolding, folding, unfolded, unfolding
nothing to push
everything to breathe
what is breathe?

messages come, messages go
there are others like me
we speak the same language
there are others unlike me
we share sensations
there is “sky”, there is “ground”, there is “sun”, there is “moon”
others visit from the sky
their noises remind me of the movement below
some are slow, some are fast
they come to share the liquid we worked so hard to make
they touch me and my sisters
they take our gold
sometimes they ask, they are always welcome
we all drink from the sky, “rain” it is called
we are pushed by “wind” (i like to think we dance)
there is “light” there is “dark”
”light” was longer …

i remember dropping ….

—9/1/2020